THe Un-Dressed Visit

Proceed with caution if you are a guy or if you have a weak stomach...

So, 36 weeks today!! Woohoo, 4 to go!  I had the dreaded doctors appointment today.  I really cannot describe how uncomfortable the stirrup visits make me.  I don't know why, I mean these people look at V's all dang day and for whatever reason I am still TERRIFIED of them!  Let's start from the beginning!  Of course I get weighed, I have gained 3 lbs in 2 weeks.  Hmmm I was told most people don't gain in the end?  Obviously I am not most people.  I proceed to pee in the cup and get my finger pricked.  The nurse then tells me that my doctor is out of the office today.  My exact words, "WHAT? so not only do I have get fisted, I have to get fisted by a STRANGER?"  Dr. Woods, she says, "Oh even better, the old guy that I have seen once."  OK ugh, I return to the waiting room to inform my husband of these shennanigans all while he is watching The Masters from his phone, very concerned I can assure you.  Finally we get called back to our room.  The nurse comes in and listens to babies heartbeat, which is great, then hands me a paper towel and tells me to put it on.  Alright, pants off, paper towel covering me and John sitting in the corner...watching the Masters.  So doctor comes in feels my belly and lays me back.  Into the stirrups I go, the dreaded stirrups.  Now apparently you have to get a V strep test.  I'm sorry what?  You can get strep of the V?  Why didn't anyone tell me this?  Not that this was any big deal, a quick swab with a Q-tip was all that was, then without any warning he says, "and one in the back."  Yeah you heard me right, one in the back, a Q-tip...in the back.  What the hell??  It was quick and painless but can a girl get some warning?  Like maybe a quick talk, nice to see ya, I am going to be placing a Q-tip here AND here, not just go for it.  I mean really?  So I am still FEARING this so called trauma I am about to endure.  Ya'll I was convinced he was about to dislocate my pelvis and go elbow deep, seriously.  Well I will have to say I was pleasantly surprised, not that anything could be very pleasant after the butt Q-tip, but it was honestly no worse than any V doctor visit.  Just a quick in and out, push on the belly and thats it.  Baby is head down and I remain closed.  I was stunned, you mean thats it?  You mean you aren't going to hurt me and make me bleed?  Nope, that was it!  He said baby will probably weigh around 7-8 lbs and we were on our way.  So we go back next week, and I have to get un-dressed again.  Ugh, I hate it but what can ya do!  But really girls, it wasn't that bad.  I have to say I was terrified for nothing.  I mean being on display is bad, but the exam was quick and painless and I am happy to know baby is right where she should be!  Here is a quick 36 week pic.

  More to come after the baby shower Saturday!!  I can't wait!


  1. Ha! I love the blog version recap even better than the phone call recap I got this morning! And John, really, the Masters while sissy is in there getting checked?? Shame dude. Aunt sister is not pleased. I'm glad that the doc didn't make you too uncomfortable, but WTH on the butt swab????????????

  2. Haha John held my hand the whole time! I just left that out! ;)

  3. Glad you weren't too terribly traumatized! Looking forward to seeing you and your fam tomorrow!!! Its going to be fun!


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