Wet Willy

Ya'll remember this guy?  

John always talks about wanting one of these.  I'm down, he is pretty cute.  
I don't wash my hair, like ever.  Its a blessing really, I have really dry hair so the dirtier it is, the better it looks.  Anyhow about day 3, 4, & 5 of no washing I curl my hair with a flat iron and get beachy, wavy cool hair.  This morning I looked like Koopa cause I slept on my dirty curly hair.

John gets up before me.  He showers and makes a lot of racket and then I get up and go get ready in my bathroom (yes we have separate cause guys are gross and beard hair sicks me out).  So back to wet willy,  I was fixing my Koopa-esque do when John walked in my bathroom looking like something STRAIGHT off a sex offender list.  His hair was soaking wet and sticking up all crazy like yet he had on work clothes (tucked in polo & all).  I busted and asked why his hair looked like that.  He had a good story ya'll.  Goes a little something like this:

"My toilet wouldn't stop running so I took the back off to jiggle that thing and thanks to our obnoxious water pressure that little tube thingie that puts the water in the thingie blew out and flung all over like a wet willy sprinkler.  Do you remember those?  We should get one."  
I can't make this shit up guys.  That was his explanation.  

Wet fucking willy.  I can't stop laughing.  At my desk.  Wet Willy.
In other news, S had disney day at school today.  Why do daycares think it is necessary to have a theme every week and make us buy shit for our kids to wear so they aren't the only ones not in a superhero, nursery rhyme, Hawaiian, Disney costume?  I did forget the cheese cubes I was supposed to bring on Hawaiian day (shit) so I'm sure they all already know I suck but anyway I dressed her for Disney day today and she looked cute.  I'm sure it will suck to nap and play outside in that hot ass costume but whatev.

Have a good weekend creeps.


  1. U crack me up! I can't wash my hair either and u are spot on a bout the beard hair!! Scarlet looks precious in her dress!!

  2. A) John's explanation is hilarious.
    B) I am imagining your Koopa do
    C) didn't someone we used to know have a wet willy? Like the Tiptons?

  3. Lol. Let's get to little S.... Couldn't you send clothes to nap & play in the hot ass sun in? Or, do they have to remain a princess for the entire day? Its freaking June, why do they have to wear costumes again???

  4. That is hilarious! Sounds like something my John would do!


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